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I had been carrying a small Bahá’í card with a picture and a quote from the Holy Writings, "Work done in the spirit of service is the highest form of worship."
I carried that card around with me for some time. Then one day I encountered a man sweeping the leaves out of the lobby of the Post Office, and I thought this was an opportunity to show appreciation for a task that needed doing so I gave him the card. I didn't know if he was a volunteer or being paid.
His face lit up as he took the card. He looked at it and read it. You could immediately see the effect it had on him; it was like he was going into a different spiritual space. And then he thanked ME! I thought to myself, "I really need to do more of this. Nowadays I try to say more than just "thank you". I might add, "You've been wonderful!" if I knew they went out of their way to help me. I put more appreciation into these words than I did before.
A friend of mine uses a quote from Shoghi Effendi in all his emails: "The more we make others happy the greater will be our own happiness and the deeper our sense of having served humanity." And that really is true. When you appreciate people face to face, you can really see that it has an effect on them; it lights up their face. On the phone, you can even hear it in their voice.
First - Try to be really observant of what people around you are doing, even when you are just casually interacting with them.
Second - Don't be stingy with your appreciation. Any little service they do, any little help is worthy of notice..
Third - Put emphasis into it, be specific, elaborate on what they did. Don't just mumble "thank you." For instance, at the grocery store, when someone really works to fit my purchases into one bag, I might say, "Oh, you're really a good packer!"
Finally - Start out small. I've been shy most of my life, but I found that it gets easier as you do it more often. Shoghi Effendi was right! When I see the effect a little appreciation has on other people, it makes me feel happier too.
The level of happiness would increase across the board if we all showed a little more appreciation. Maybe people would even start to appreciate themselves more, too. For marriages, especially when you've been married a long time, there's a tendency to take one another for granted. Same thing with children: Praise children for their accomplishments; it makes them want to do more.
Everyone wants to be appreciated!
Photo courtesy of Bahai.us